Please

Friday, June 30, 2006

How can things have changed so drastically in less than a week? Monday I was all optimism and rainbows and puppy dogs. Today I’m pretty doomy-gloomy. Part of it is the fact that Jay is taking a lot of his frustration out on me. I’m trying so hard to be understanding, because I know he’s going through a tough time. But I’m going through the same tough time with him and being yelled at everyday makes it that much worse.

Yesterday, one of my worst fears was realized. I had a tire blow on the interstate. I handled it surprisingly well, however. Whenever I had imagined it happening in my worst nightmares, I froze up and lost control of the car, ending with a fiery crash. In reality, I was really more irritated than I was scared. I simply got over to the shoulder of the road, uttered a few choice swears, and got to work changing the tire. I ripped some skin off my right hand working the jack, but I was well on my way to a flawless tire change when a state cop pulled up and helped me finish the job. How nice of him, to rescue the damsel in distress. Ha. I’m so far from a helpless female it’s not even funny.

Now if I can just get over my other fears: swimming in the ocean, geese, hippies, and thunderstorms. I know, I know. For being the farthest thing from a damsel in distress, I have some pretty wussy fears. I assure you, most of them are direct results of some type of childhood trauma. But none of it makes good stories. Except maybe the hippie thing… But I digress.

Today is the last day of the month. Maybe our awful, horrible, no-good, very bad month will be over, and we can start on some better times. Please let it be.